The Fragility of Love
and the Complex Path to Loving Well

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“How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach….”
43rd Sonnet written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning in the 19th century.

From this beautiful romantic poem we are led to believe that to love is uplifting, heartwarming and provides intimate connection that lasts forever, way beyond our current lifetime.

Shattered Glass

Shattered Glass (Photo credit: ImageMD)

The truth about being human and loving in the real world

is that very few of us have experienced such all-consuming, lifelong, undying and passionate love.  For those of us who find ourselves in the throes of love, we really do believe it will last forever.  We believe that the passion will always be there and our hearts will continue to lead us back to love.

But love does not always prevail.  Continue reading →

The A, B, C’s of Love – The Art of Loving Made Simple

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Loving is Our Most Natural State. 

Observe any baby smiling, cooing and giggling with delight at mommy, daddy and strangers.  Most animals are also naturally loving to members of their own species – and often that affection extends to other species and to humans.  Even ferocious lions and tigers have been known to “love” the humans who nurtured them since infancy.

Hey Girl Baby ABCs_of_Love

Hey Girl Baby ABCs_of_Love (Photo credit: @fredsko)

Animals love easily and effortlessly and will aggressively defend the ones they love.  Humans, on the other hand, often develop convoluted love.  They may feel love at moments and then allow their thoughts and emotions to interfere with and block that love.  Their behavior may appear to be exactly the opposite of love, but if asked about it they may say with confidence “I love him” or “I love her.” Continue reading →

Other People Make Relationships Difficult – 3 Questions To Ask Yourself

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“Some people have all the luck,” my friend recently told me.  “I always choose the wrong men.”  She went on to explain her latest relationship fiasco and how her partner got defensive, “as he always does,” and broke up with her.   Her immediate response was to blame him for not being good at relationships, for not caring enough and for not appreciating everything she did for him.

RelationshipCommunication

The part that my friend left out of the equation was the subtle and not so subtle ways that she pushed her partner away and stopped him from feeling safe in her presence.  She forgets to mention the numerous times she unfairly criticized him, told him what she thought he should or should not do, and refused to listen to his perspective on a problem. Continue reading →

Speak Up – 3 Steps to Having that Important Relationship Conversation

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We have all heard that relationships require good communication, honest and open sharing about what truly matters.  However, most of us can easily fall into a rut in which we attempt to talk about the elephant in the room but our partner stops us in our tracks.  For many of us it seems easier to just let it go than to keep harping on a difficult issue.  What would you do Continue reading →